♪
[JEWELRY JINGLING]
That's every Senate press release
for the last month.
Thanks. Anyone ever tell you you're a noisy one?
I like metal.
[GIGGLES]
How lovely for you.
Now, lose 'em, I can't think.
Then have a seat, and I'll teach you the angry phone voice.
The new intern's something, huh?
Who, Tina? Nah, too cool for me.
Excuse me?
Well, look at her. She's gorgeous.
She gets to hang out with the famous Lois Lane all day.
Me? I'm just a nobody.
You're selling yourself short.
Ask her out.
I already tried, twice.
First time, she said her cat was sick.
And the second?
She told me to buzz off.
She's learning from Lois already.
Jimmy, wait.
[SIRENS WAILING, HELICOPTER WHIRRING]
Look at that, another one.
It's every week now.
What is it with these people?
Don't know. Never seen anything like it.
Second one this week.
[GROUP CHATTERING]
[SIREN WAILING]
REPORTER: What started as a minor moving violation
has turned into the latest perilous pursuit
through downtown Metropolis.
The suspect has just veered onto Southend Highway
and is headed right toward Humphrey Plaza.
Humphrey Plaza?
That's right outside.
WOMAN: Wait, hey, let's go over there.
[GROUP CHATTERING]
♪
[TIRES SCREECH]
[SIRENS WAILING]
Whoa!
Get lower, I want a better shot!
[CROWD SCREAMING]
WOMAN: Look at that! It's Superman!
[CROWD CHATTERING]
WOMAN 2: He saved everybody, it was amazing!
Get the crew out.
Gimme a hand!
Ah! Ooh!
Ah.
Come on, wake up.
[COUGHING]
How's he doing?
I think he's all right.
Paramedics are on their way.
Got time for a statement, Superman?
You wouldn't want it.
Thanks for your help, Jimmy.
Cut. Hey, Olsen, you're friends with Superman, right?
Want to do an interview?
Uh, I don't think
I'd be real comfortable with that.
Why not? Camera-shy?
No, but it's not like I'd call us "pals" or anything.
Well, you know him, right?
Yeah.
That's good enough for me.
So how would you characterize your friendship with Superman?
Real comfortable. I'd call us pals.
There you have it. Superman has a pal.
My investigative team has uncovered link after link
between the Man of Steel
and James Olsen Junior, "Jimmy" to his friends.
According to our research,
you single-handedly saved Superman's skin
from both the Parasite and Luminus.
Plus, we're told you went undercover at his request
to crack Intergang's connection to Apokolips.
Is all of this true? Yeah.
LOIS: What? Hold it right there.
First of all, Superman saved us from Luminus,
not the other way around.
And second, what am I, chopped liver?
Aw, I'm sure Superman likes you too.
[SIGHS]
TINA: Jimmy?
Okay, lay it on. I deserve it.
I was wondering
if you still wanted to go out with me sometime.
I-I'm sorry, what?
I'll take that as a yes. Tonight okay?
I'll see you right after work.
Uh, yeah. Okay.
Heh-heh-hey. Superman's pal, right?
Breakfast, on the house.
Huh?
Superman's pal?
From TV, last night?
WOMAN: Oh, can I have your autograph?
[GROUP CHATTERING]
Oh, glad you liked your dinner, Jimbo.
But next time, come by with your buddy, Superman.
You bet. Thanks again for picking up the tab.
My subway's that way.
Oh, oh, okay. Now, where was I?
Oh, yeah, the Fortress of Solitude.
You've been there?
Well, I haven't been there yet,
but the big guy told me all about it.
He says he'll take me there one of these days.
You must be close.
Ah, save a guy's life once or twice
he sort of starts to hang on ya. I don't mind.
♪
Watch it, idiot.
Whoa, uh, sorry.
Wait a second.
You're Superman's twerp, ain't ya?
Uh, not exact... This is perfect.
Superman put my best buddy in the slammer.
Now I'm gonna put his buddy in the morgue.
♪
So how do you call Superman?
I yell, same as anyone else.
Ah!
Run. Get help.
Hey. Hey, come on.
[MEN SHOUTING]
MAN: Get him!
Help, Superman.
Jimmy Olsen needs help.
Huh?
[GRUNTS]
Yah!
You're kidding, right?
MAN: I think we better get outta here.
MAN 2: No trouble.
Let's go! Come on!
You okay?
Jimmy.
Oh, thank God, you're all right.
You heard me.
You really are friends with Jimmy.
He's all right. But you better clear up this "pal" stuff.
I can't be within earshot every time.
Whoa. Hey, Angela.
No time, kid.
Wait. Listen.
You gotta take back that story about me.
I almost got killed last night.
Take it back? I make him a star, and this is the thanks I get.
You're Superman's friend, right?
No, I swear. It isn't me.
I know Superman. He pulled me out of the drink once
when my boat sank.
Yeah, if it wasn't for Superman, I'd be a goner for sure.
Come to think of it, I never got to thank the big lug.
Tell you what, if I wrote him a thank-you note,
you think you could...
MAN: Pass an invitation on to him?
My kid's birthday's coming up, and he just loves Superman.
Superman this, Superman that.
♪
If I wasn't such a secure father, I'd be jealous.
Anyway, the little guy'd really appreciate it...
If Big Blue would do
an endorsement on one of our TV spots.
We're Big Blue Automotive.
And don't you worry, you'd get a finder's fee.
I take care of my friends. Frankly, my boy,
you have no idea how much it would mean...
To all the little baby seals
if Superman would come to our charity dinner.
It's black-tie, but he could come as-is, of course.
So do you think you could show him these pamphlets?
It wouldn't take him long to read them.
I mean, he is Superman, right?
[GRUNTS]
And it would really help raise awareness of the hardship...
MAN: I have to put up with because of that noisy,
stinking neighbor of mine. Now, if Superman was to pop by
and lay a few of those super punches into the wall,
then that louse would turn down his stereo.
Hey, I ain't done talkin' to you's yet!
GIRL: Oh, look, it's Superman's friend.
[ALL SQUEALING]
GIRL 2: He's even cuter than his picture.
GIRL 3: Oh, come here.
Oh, you could be my baby.
[SQUEALING]
GIRL: Come back. Come back.
He's mine, mine.
GIRL 3: I want him for me, for me and my sister.
He's just what we're looking for.
GIRL 4: He's so cute.
GIRL 3: Oh, God.
[SCREECHING TIRES]
Jimmy, get in.
GIRL: I almost got him, I almost got him.
[ALL WHINING]
I have got to get Angela to take back that story.
Why would she do that? It's true, isn't it?
No.
But...
you're special to Superman. I saw it myself.
He showed up to rescue you and everything.
Yeah, but he'd do that for anyone.
People are making too much of this.
I need a break.
Don't worry. I'll take you somewhere private.
Wh-what are we doing here?
I want you to meet a friend of mine.
At a scrap yard?
You'll see.
♪
MAN: What is this?
Why have you brought me him?
[GASPS]
Mmm-mwah.
Hi, honey.
What is going on?
Shut up.
I'd like an explanation myself.
You were supposed to bring Lois.
Lane was too hard to trick.
This one was easy.
But will Superman come for him?
Trust me. They're good friends.
I even staged a test last night.
Mmm-mwah.
Ah!
[CRASH] Huh?
Ahh!
[MACHINERY RUMBLING]
[GASPS]
Careful.
We don't want to damage our collateral just yet.
Speak for yourself.
You didn't have to spend an evening with him.
[SCREAMS]
[WHIMPERING]
And I thought I was cold-hearted.
I learned from the best, sweetie.
[PHONE RINGS] Lane.
Lois? It's Tina.
Jimmy and I have been kidnapped.
Sounds like some wacko
wants his manifesto in the paper.
The police traced the call
to a scrap yard north of the city.
They said we should play along
until they can scramble a team up there.
I gotta start wearing pants.
♪
JIMMY: Superman.
Superman, it's a trap. It's...
Metallo.
[GRUNTING]
Ah!
Looks like I've caught you off-guard, Superman.
You've come without your protective outerwear.
[BLOWS THUDDING]
[GRUNTS]
It's remarkable how easy this is
once I have you alone and unprepared.
If it wasn't so much fun,
I might actually feel bad for you.
Brought me a present?
Call this off. Stop him.
Me stop him?
You've got a twisted sense of who's working for whom.
How could you help him? He's killing Superman.
What can I say?
Hyah!
Ah!
I'm into metal. Ha!
Ooh!
Hee... Ha!
Ugh. Oh.
Ow!
Hey.
Let me out, you little runt.
Let me out!
Oh!
[CRASH]
What?
[GRUNTING]
[GROANING]
Ah!
Ugh.
Care to try again?
Come, now, Superman.
Do you really think you'll ever win this way?
[GRUNTING]
Ahh!
[GROWLING]
Ah!
[METAL RUMBLING]
[LAUGHING]
I must say, you two make quite a team.
Dramatic, but feeble.
[GRUNTING]
What was that supposed to be?
Battery acid.
[SIZZLING]
Ah!
SUPERMAN: Still kicking yourself?
Why shouldn't I?
I messed things up bigtime.
You lived up to your press, Jimmy.
You saved my life again.
Here, I made you a thank-you gift.
You didn't have to.
I mean, you've saved my life too.
Only like a million times.
It's not just a watch.
This button emits a hypersonic signal.
If I'm anywhere in the city, I'll hear it and I'll come.
I figured you might need it
now that everyone knows we're friends.
Just don't wear it out.
♪